Fanboys Anonymous

Sex sells, and boy does it sell well. The past two years, I've gone ahead and made posts about the top 10 women on my television screen that I've developed a fictional (or real) crush on, and the first of those articles is still above and beyond the most viewed page in this website's history. So, that being said, are you really surprised that I'll be doing this again?


To preface things again, I'm putting the majority of my focus for this list on two aspects: the appearance of the actresses portraying the characters (obviously) and the personality of the characters, rather than the actresses themselves. For all I know, the actresses could be terrible people, but if the characters are endearing, then points are awarded. Also, this list has nothing to do with points, but you know what I mean.

Sadly, some of my list from before are not returning, as those shows have been cancelled, so you can say goodbye to Abigail (Mackenzie Mauzy) and Detective Jo Martinez (Alana de la Garza) from Forever as well as Maggie Langston (Devin Kelley) from Resurrection, Zelda Vasco (Cristin Miloti) from A to Z, and Brittany Dobler (Rebecca Rittenhouse) from Red Band Society. They will be missed. Also, what's up with Person of Interest not coming back soon? I need some Sarah Shahi!

In no particular order, here is the list of the top 10 ladies that have caught my attention this season (so far):

Ginny (Daisy Betts) from The Player 


This show was on my bubble list where I wasn't sure if I would like it or hate it, similar to Lookinglass, which hasn't aired yet. Although I don't care about the characters on the show yet, there's one that resonated with me immediately, and that's Ginny. She's introduced to us as protagonist Alex Kane's ex-wife with whom he's still "friendly" for one reason or another. Two seconds into seeing her on screen, I thought to myself, "Okay, I get it." Daisy Betts is beautiful and first caught my attention with Persons Unknown, but I wasn't a huge fan of her character on that show. Here, on the other hand, she's charming, quirky, cute, and has a slight tinge of a dark side to her that is sexy on top of it. She's in a grand total of maybe four scenes before it turns out (spoiler alert) she's killed off (end spoiler) yet that was enough time for me to buy into the type of response I'm supposed to have as a viewer. I'm eagerly awaiting more from her, if not just to get lost in her eyes. Look at them. Tell me I'm wrong. Just watch out for when she smiles, 'cause if that hits you, you're done.

Ah shit, well, I guess I'm in love now.

Barbara Kean (Erin Richards) from Gotham


Here's an example of pure lust, because I'm damn sure not stupid enough to get myself wrapped up in someone as crazy as Barbara. Still, I have to admit that Erin Richards is just flat-out gorgeous and has such striking features that I can't help but admit she'd be able to wrap me around her finger at least momentarily while I was distracted. Barbara's rocking the "Holy shit, is this girl nuts and probably amazing in bed for one night before I would have to run away and change my name to get away from her" attitude this season. Not only that, she's sporting a new look that reminds me so, so much of Michelle Pfeiffer from Batman Returns, which even as a kid I was willing to admit was oddly sexy.

Left: Erin Richards as Barbara Kean / Right: Michelle Pfeiffer as Selina Kyle

Many points go to Morena Baccarin's Leslie Thompkins, who is also beautiful and has a much more levelheaded personality, but she's still a second in my book to Erin Richards. For that matter, Jessica Lucas is even more attractive than both Richards and Baccarin, but this show isn't doing her justice yet with the Tabitha Galavan character, who I'm worried will be utterly pointless by the end of the season.

Paige Dineen (Katharine McPhee) from Scorpion

Scorpion Season 2 Episode 2 - Cuba Libre beach wet shirt scene = great fan service

See that photo above? So far, that's been one of the only times the show Scorpion has highlighted Katharine McPhee's beauty, and while it's definitely appreciated (because, well, look), I actually like how they aren't trying to make her too much of a temptress.

McPhee has that girl next door charm as it is, but the Paige Dineen character really brings it out even more. On a team filled with socially awkward geniuses, Paige's character is the easiest to identify with and the one that stands out as the true heart. She's out of her element, but she still sticks it out with the team for the greater good, which is admirable. On top of that, she's the one holding down the fort when people get too emotional, and I can't stress enough how enticing it is to be with someone who is rational. Since everyone is a wet noodle, the writers could have made her someone who goes through irrational mood swings all the time just to bring that element to the group, but she thankfully doesn't fall into that stereotypical trope.

Paige finds a nice balance between being undeniably glamorous and being the most tolerable person among the cast to likely get along with. They're all crazy and a handful, but Paige is just a good mom, a sweet person, and a kind soul who just happens to be a knockout.

Daisy Johnson / Skye (Chloe Bennet) from Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.


Chloe Bennet needs to stop getting progressively more attractive each season or by season five, I'm not going to be able to take it anymore. This time around, she has a new hairstyle to go with her change in character, and it's an upgrade. I actually don't like shorter hair on women, and when I heard Chloe would be cutting her hair in preparation for the role I assumed it would be as short as the character is for the comics, so I panicked a bit. This thankfully isn't that short, and she pulls it off so well that I kind of hope she keeps it for a long while. As far as the character goes, Skye may have changed her name to Daisy, but she's still quippy, quirky, goodhearted, and honorable. What's not to love, especially when it's all wrapped up in a neat little package complete with those killer eyes?

Hat tip to the other beautiful women in the show that were very, very close to making this list, including Jemma Simmons (Elizabeth Henstridge) who was only briefly seen, and ass kicker turned hot doc Bobbi Morse (Adrianne Palicki). Agent Melinda May was sadly M.I.A. for this first episode, but has since then proved that Ming-Na Wen isn't any less sexy than before, since that woman hasn't aged in decades.

Kim Martin (Rachael Harris) from Lucifer


Technically, Lucifer hasn't aired yet, but that didn't stop the pilot from being leaked, or me from watching it, and reviewing it, and liking it quite a bit. I was pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoyed it, as I felt that there was a good chance I could hate it. Outside of the show itself impressing me, one of the things about it that I liked a lot was the character of Kim Martin, therapist to our protagonist who falls for his charms and admits she just really wants some. Clocking in at 47 as the oldest person on this list, Rachael Harris wouldn't have been someone I'd expect last year to be on this article, but here she is. I like smart women as well as funny women, and the character was written as both intelligent and to give some laughs, while having a sort of repressed sexual energy about her that totally plays up the MILF factor combined with the "hot librarian/secretary" vibe, and I'm digging it. If I'm up for a night with Barbara Kean, why would I turn down Kim Martin for having some dirty thoughts?

I haven't fully warmed up to Lauren German's character Chloe Dancer, although she did go from a stark dislike to winning me over by the end of the episode. More time will likely help. Lesley-Ann Brandt is sexy in her own right as the darker and clearly more sinful Mazikeen a.k.a. Maze, but neither of those stands out to me as much as Kim Martin. You may disagree with me, but I think there's added value to being the good girl on the outside and having a bit of a bad girl on the inside (within reason) as opposed to being overtly sexual at face value.

Kara Danvers / Kara Zor-El (Melissa Benoist) from Supergirl


Similar to the situation with Lucifer, the pilot was leaked months ago, so while the show has yet to make its debut, I'm already an episode into it. Unlike Lucifer, this show pisses me off in more ways than one, but I'm hoping that it will turn around. Despite what I don't like about it, one thing I have to admit is that I would completely fall for Kara Danvers if she were in my life. I haven't seen Melissa Benoist in anything before, unless you count The Fappening, in which case my reviews are stellar. Just from a physical perspective, the girl is clearly attractive, as she's got a very cute face to go with a fit body. When you couple that with the two different personas of Kara's character in the show, that just magnifies the attractiveness so much more.

In her civilian persona, Kara is the type of girl that you sort of pity for her abundant cuteness, stammering on her words, acting shy in the corner, being socially awkward and adorable, and just the complete opposite of Calista Flockhart's mega bitch Cat Grant. Chyler Leigh is an actress I've thought was attractive ever since Not Another Teen Movie (one of my favorite comedies), but the jury is still out on Alex Danvers, who I don't find to be all that likable yet, as she's too stern. You'd think that I would feel the same way about the Kara Zor-El persona of Supergirl, but I don't. After suiting up as the heroine, Benoist switches over to a different type of appeal: confidence. There are several bad girls on this list, but at the end of the day, they follow the same rule that's always been said about the bad boys—you date them, but you marry the good ones. If we're playing the "marry, fuck, or kill" game with this trio, I'm sure you can guess who gets the axe and who doesn't if Kara is the one who gets the ring.

Also, I'm just gonna leave this here for you...

"I'm not flying around saving people in this thing. I wouldn't even wear it to the beach."

Detective Amy Santiago (Melissa Fumero) from Brooklyn Nine-Nine


You can pretty much copy and paste everything I said the past two years about Amy Santiago and the same applies this year, as the character hasn't changed, thankfully. Melissa Fumero's beauty is understated, and they play up the sort of loser dork angle with Santiago, but I happen to love that. Instead of being the seductress, she's clumsy and can be easily made fun of, which brings her down to an accessible level.

Granted, she can be neurotic, and I would probably find that annoying after a while—I'm not ignoring that. Still, if you compare her to Rosa Diaz (Stephanie Beatriz) and Gina Linetti (Chelsea Peretti), she's the winner of the bunch. Rosa is hot, but too much of an angry bitch. Gina is fun and not a bad looker, but she's so self-centered and bitchy that it'd be tough to even be her friend, let alone date her. With Santiago, I think her positives far outweigh her flaws and those negatives are much more easily manageable.

Plus, Santiago is intelligent, and that goes a long way with me. Smart, cute personality, pretty face, and not boastful about any of it other than her intelligence (which she is self-deprecating about at times, too) = a great combination.

Molly Walker (Francesca Eastwood) from Heroes Reborn

Get your shit together, Molly.

Yeah, I don't have much of an explanation for this one. I just think she's kind of hot, although I'll admit she's much trashier than my tastes. I miss the good old days of the ridiculously attractive cast from the original series, which included so many super good looking people like Hayden Panettiere, Ali Larter, Kristen Bell, Dania Ramirez, Dana Davis, Dawn Olivieri, Jayma Mays, and perhaps my favorite of all, Missy Peregrym.

Unfortunately, Molly Walker is no more, as her character has been killed off. I'm not fond of that decision, nor am I fond of how they've handled the character in this reboot series, but setting all that aside, Francesca Eastwood deserves a nod just for catching my eye.

[TIE] Iris West (Candice Patton) / Caitlin Snow (Danielle Panabaker) from The Flash

There was once a time where Arrow was knocking it out of the park for female characters that I had a bit of a thing for. Katie Cassidy is someone who I've thought was super hot ever since first seeing her in Click, and the rest of the cast was just as attractive, if not more. However, over the past few seasons, I've grown to dislike all of them in some significant way that I can't add them on this list anymore. When was the last time Felicity Smoak wasn't a whiny tear-factory? Why is Laurel so damn pouty all the time when we know Sara's just going to come back to life for the umpteenth time? Does Thea really have a death wish, since she keeps begging people to kill her? Ugh, annoying.

With The Flash, though, things are a different story. Some may criticize Iris West for being a little like Laurel from the first season of Arrow, but I think her bothersome qualities are much less pronounced. When she's not being written as an obstacle to get in Barry's way, she's just a sweet, inquisitive girl who stands up for herself. It doesn't hurt that Candice Patton has an incredibly captivating smile and the eyes to go along with it.

I couldn't just ignore Caitlin Snow, though, who is the brainier of the two as well as the cuter as far as personality goes, in my opinion, and on equal attractiveness for the actress, Danielle Panabaker. I don't have a lot to say to elaborate on why she would be someone who I'd pursue in real life, so much as to just say that I've got no complaints in any departments—unless she turns into Killer Frost and, you know, kills me.

Fan art created by BossLogic

Now that's hot.

BONUS UPDATE: After seeing a few more episodes, I would actually push both Iris West and Caitlin Snow aside and opt for Patty Spivot instead above both of them.

Cassandra King (Charity Wakefield) from The Player


Although to a much lesser extent than Ginny listed above, Cassandra King from The Player has done a drastic turnaround for me from the first episode to the second. Originally, I found her character a little on the annoying side and I didn't quite see the intrigue, but in episode 2, my opinion changed. Perhaps it was because her demeanor softened a bit, and she seemed less villainous than before. Then again, maybe it's just because she lets her hair down in the episode (both literally and figuratively) and looks really good. One way or another, I had to decide between adding her to this list or Penny (Kaley Cuoco) from The Big Bang Theory, and when comparing the two, I realized just how bland and bothersome Penny's gotten while Cassandra made a 180-degree rotation in a positive way. Plus, c'mon, that accent.

Well those are the top ten women I'm watching on television right now that I can't help but have a thing for. There are other shows with other beautiful ladies that I'm missing out on, as well as ones that I'm watching that just didn't make the cut (I'm looking at you, Minority Report and Limitless) but that's just my opinion. I'm interested in your list, so make sure you sound off!