Fanboys Anonymous

Welcome to another edition of Wed, Bed, or Dead—the Fanboys Anonymous equivalent to games such as Marry/Fuck/Kill, or "Kill, Bang, Marry" or any of those other alternative names with the same "would you rather" ranking concept.

If you're unfamiliar with these games, here are the rules: three men or women will be pitted against each other and you are forced to place each of them into a specific category of your choosing. You cannot double up on any category, replace people, or anything else. You must pick one to "Wed" (marry), one to "Bed" (have sex with), and for "Dead" (kill)—in theory, of course.



Lynda Carter was the first actress to play Wonder Woman in a live action format, starring as the protagonist in a television series which ran from 1975 to 1979. While she was limited in what she could do when it came to special effects and the mindset of a different generation who still hadn't quite grasped a lot of aspects of the superhero genre, she became a pop culture icon in many regards as well as the first crush for a whole generation of boys.

Adrianne Palicki is better known as Mockingbird (Bobbi Morse) on Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. television series, but before that came to pass, she was cast as the next incarnation of Wonder Woman in the pilot for a 2011 show. Reception for this was considerably poor to the point where it never even aired, let alone being picked up for a regular season. This version tried to keep some campy elements from before while also having one foot in the more modern era, which proved to be a disastrous clash of ridiculousness and attitude like it was suffering from some kind of bipolar mood swing every other scene.

Gal Gadot is the most recent actress to portray the character in Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice. There was an intense backlash to her casting, with many criticizing her look (both the size of her breasts and her musculature) as well as her acting experience, predicting she couldn't possibly be able to bring the character to life. However, to many, she was the standout hero of the film, and despite the weak reception the movie received, a good portion of the fan base is more excited than ever for her solo film set to come out June 23, 2017.


For these games, I like to use a three-point criteria of Attraction, Personality and Wildcard. Attraction and Personality are pretty self-explanatory, focusing on their looks and what goes on behind the scenes. Something like their intelligence, character traits, behavioral attitude, and so forth would go under Personality, while their physical appearance and sexiness make up the bulk of Attraction. As far as Wildcard goes, those could be any other factors that take away or add to someone's appeal.

Palicki's version of the character is kind of a bitch, but she's much better looking in my opinion than Lynda Carter, as I don't have nostalgia goggles to tie me to that time period. Gal Gadot's version is just as attractive as Palicki's for physical means, but didn't get under my skin as far as her personality went. She was assertive in the right way, wholeheartedly heroic, and a bit of a tease, too, to show that she has a little bit of humor.